Planet Rugby

Rugby carols by candlelight

25th December 2009 09:46


little angels

'We wish you a merry Christmas...!'

It's Christmas day, and all over the world people and families are singing the traditional songs... but for those of you missing your rugby fix, here's a few rugby carols!

Argentina joining the Tri-Nations (To the tune of We Three Kings)

We three kings of SANZAR we are,
Bearing the Pumas from Argentina afar,
Now a Four Nations and less complaining,
Means more beers to be had at the bar.

O, Pumas of wonder, Pumas of might,
Juan Martin Hernandez with a future bright,
Fernandez Lobbe leading, still proceeding,
To give the All Blacks a little fright.

England's form in the November Tests (To the tune of Let It Snow! Let It Snow! Let It Snow!)

Oh the results this year were frightful,
But having Jonny back is so delightful,
And since tries at Twickenham were a no-show,
How low can you go! Can you go! Can you go!

Johnson doesn't show signs of stopping,
And I've bought a season ticket for nothing,
Can I get a refund or no?
How low can you go! Can you go! Can you go!

At least we finally got a win,
Even though they had players in the bin!
Any hope of getting things right,
Were put to bed by NZ on the night!

The Johnson hype is slowly dying,
And England fans are not surviving,
But as long as you love the red Rose so,
How low can you go! Can you go! Can you go!

Peter de Villiers and the media (To the tune of Away In A Manger)

Away on a tangent, no earmuffs in sight,
PDV comparing mechanics: black and white.
Oregan Hoskins looked down in dismay,
While the room fills with laughter on a Bok media day.

The sniggers are growing, John Smit stays away,
But PDV keeps on going, verbal diarrhoea on display.
From rugby to dancing, Dick Muir looks to the sky,
But stands by his colleague, while thinking 'why, oh why?'

The moustache starts tingling, Gary Gold's ears are ringing,
What will PDV say next, to leave everyone perplexed?
His temper is rising, which isn't too surprising,
But his results say more, than Tiger Woods' womanising.

IRB Player of the Year decision (To the tune of Jingle Bells)

Through the names we go
With only one player in mind
As the excuses grow
It's McCaw who is aligned
Bells whiskey on the lips
Drinking spirits is a delight
What fun it is to laugh and sing
At the IRB tonight

Oh, jingle bells, the IRB smells
They always get their way
Oh, what fun it must be to cite
Players every day and night
Jingle bells, the IRB smells
They always get their way
Oh, how many rules can you change
From December until May

A week or two ago
They took us for a ride
By shunning Fourie du Preez
Like a kick in the backside
BOD was left out too
Misfortune seemed his lot
How McCaw got the vote
Will never be forgot

Oh, jingle bells, the IRB smells
They always get their way
Oh, what fun it must be to cite
Players day and night
Jingle bells, the IRB smells
They always get their way
Oh, how brave their choice must be
Next year will be a referee!

Gavin Henson in trouble again (To the tune of Rudolph The Red Nosed Reindeer)

Gavin the injury-prone Welshman,
Had a very drinking nose,
And if the Ospreys ever saw it,
You could even say it glows.

All of the other pub locals,
Used to be called horrible names;
Because they never let poor Gavin,
Watch re-runs of his rugby games.

Then one drunkard Six Nations Eve,
Warren Gatland came to say:
"Gavin with your bar tab out of sight,
Won't you guide me home tonight?"

Then how the locals loved him
As they shouted out with glee,
"Gavin the hard-nosed boozer,
You'll always be a mystery!"

By Dave Morris

Forthcoming Fixtures
All times are local
Top 14
Friday , August 29
Clermont Auvergne vs Montpellier20:45
Saturday , August 30
La Rochelle vs Toulouse14:45
Lyon vs Brive18:30
Oyonnax vs Stade Francais18:30
Castres vs Bay Of Plenty18:30
Grenoble vs Bordeaux-Begles18:30
Racing Metro Paris vs Toulon20:45
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Currie Cup
Friday , August 29
Pumas vs Sharks19:10
Saturday , August 30
Griquas vs Cheetahs15:00
Blue Bulls vs Western Province17:05
Eastern Province Kings vs Lions19:10
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Thursday , August 28
Canterbury vs NorthlandCanterbury vs Northland Preview
Friday , August 29
Wellington vs ManawatuWellington vs Manawatu Preview
Saturday , August 30
Counties Manukau vs Hawkes Bay04:35
Southland vs Otago17:35
North Harbour vs Waikato09:35
Sunday , August 31
Taranaki vs Bay Of Plenty14:35
Auckland vs Tasman16:35
More ITM Cup fixtures
Recent Results
All times are local
Wednesday, August 27
Waikato 17 - 46 TaranakiWaikato vs Taranaki Report
Sunday , August 24
Manawatu 7 - 35 AucklandManawatu vs Auckland Report
Bay Of Plenty 27 - 56 TasmanBay Of Plenty vs Tasman Report
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Rugby Championship
Saturday , August 23
New Zealand 51 - 20 AustraliaNew Zealand vs Australia Report
Argentina 31 - 33 South AfricaArgentina vs South Africa Report
More Rugby Championship results
Top 14
Brive 6 - 21 Clermont AuvergneBrive vs Clermont Auvergne Report
Stade Francais 23 - 20 Lyon
Bordeaux-Begles 30 - 21 Racing Metro Paris
Montpellier 20 - 17 GrenobleMontpellier vs Grenoble Report
Toulon 60 - 19 La Rochelle
Bayonne 38 - 12 Oyonnax
More Top 14 results
Currie Cup
Blue Bulls 30 - 25 Eastern Province KingsBlue Bulls vs Eastern Province Kings Report
Sharks 19 - 16 CheetahsSharks vs Cheetahs Report
Western Province 27 - 14 LionsWestern Province vs Lions Report
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Northland 35 - 5 WellingtonNorthland vs Wellington Report
Counties Manukau 29 - 25 OtagoCounties Manukau vs Otago Report
More ITM Cup results
Top 14
Friday , August 22
Toulouse 35 - 6 CastresToulouse vs Castres Report
More Top 14 results
Currie Cup
Pumas 33 - 15 GriquasPumas vs Griquas Report
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Waikato 27 - 58 CanterburyWaikato vs Canterbury Report
Hawkes Bay 29 - 26 TaranakiHawkes Bay vs Taranaki Report
Thursday , August 21
North Harbour 21 - 25 Southland
Sunday , August 17
Tasman 35 - 15 Hawkes BayTasman vs Hawkes Bay Report
Northland 23 - 28 Manawatu
More ITM Cup results
Rugby Championship
Saturday , August 16
Australia 12 - 12 New ZealandAustralia vs New Zealand Report
South Africa 13 - 6 ArgentinaSouth Africa vs Argentina Report
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